My ex's mom used to watch that. It made me want to write a satire about the people doing the reporting. 

I...liked Transformers: Beast Wars more than the original Transformers.

::ducks::

Beast Wars was better! Rhinox or Silverbolt were my favs!

Bowserboy would be a pretty good nickname for you, tbh.

Lol, sorry, that must seem random. It was what Blackarachnia called Silverbolt. They had my favorite romance in the history of children's cartoons. 

It was good boy meets bad girl, to the extreme. Blackarachnia was a femme fatale while Silverbolt was pretty much Galahad. It was adorably cheesy.

I forgot that she called him that! You'll have to forgive me I haven't seen the show in ages.


... and it all resulted in a bunch of HORRIFYING wolf-spider babies!




Also I'm definitely not pure enough to be considered Galahad-esque! I could maybe pull off Lancelot, out searching for my Guinevere.

This one goes back a little. I might have been ten years old.

I stopped at a gas station with my mom, 'cause I had to piss, right? The doors to the bathroom are on the outside of the building, and of course, they were locked. Locked shitters are a pain in the ass. I guess it's so tweakers don't go in there and do... tweaker shit.

Anyways, I go in and get the key. Once finally inside, ready to take my three gallon piss, I realize the lights are out. Not like, off, but 100% burned out. Fucking great. Now I gotta feel around a disgusting bathroom for a place to let it go.

Ha. Nope. I just started pissin'. Not just a polite little stream onto the floor, either. I was arcing that stream like I was going for the world record of the longest distance ever pissed. I know it got everywhere. Sink, mirror, paper towels, toilet, urinal, fuckin... ceiling and everything. It had to.

I.. i... an realy an Autobot. Im just a data librarian who is a micromaster size. Im not a Dinosaur just a Cenowith scorpion FAV.
My real name is Shortwave.